Men can't handle serious relationships

Why? Simple as ABC! They don’t want to commit themselves! Men view relationships slightly different than women. Women tend to take relationship more serious and give whole heartedly to their partner. Everything is concentrated on their men. For them, men is their world.

As for men, they try to rub off any serious bonding, afraid of been tied down. They worry of losing the freedom to do things they like and as when they like to. Once committed in a relationship, their time would be shared equally (although that is not the case) among work, play and woman! Most of the time, women take up most of their time! So, men tend to “run away” if women started to be more possessive and controlling their time, behavior, habit and interest.

22 months

Little J is 22 months old today! Meaning 2 more months she will turn 2 years old.

It is also time for her daddy and mummy to decide which playschool to enrol her in. Hopefully with her going to playschool she would be able to build her independence around people and her learning new things.

She is not a shy girl around people, which we are glad for. However she can be over-friendly with people sometimes. LOL! She can say "hi" and wave to strangers when she wants to. There was a time when we went to KK last year, and she waved and said "Hi" to those foreign tourists in the lift! We have a laugh. I remember an ang mo commented on her been "a friendly baby" to us. LOL!

She is about 83cm tall and weighing around 12kg now. She still pretty active and hardly can sit and quiet for a second. I always heard from other mums that once they reach certain age, especially 2 years old and above, children will be more obedient and well-mannered. So, is Little J going to be obedient and listen to what her daddy and mummy said when she is turning 2??

Her 2 years old birthday will fall on a Monday. We havent decide what to do for her birthday yet. Maybe a simple cake with candle on top for her? Or a joint-celebration with her cousin, Chloe who happen to have the same birthday as hers. We see how it goes......

On the way

Me : Where are you?
Big J : Outside
Me : Are you coming home?
Big J : Yes. On the way, actually
Me : Ok, I wait for you

(Result: Big J reaching home 1 hour later)

Now what is your understand of this phrase “on the way”? Is sitting in the pub stool meaning you on the way out? Is walking out from the toilet and continue drinking, meaning on the way out?

"On the way". It is Big J’s most used phrase since we started dating. I got used to it by now, after many times of been fooled. I have to call him up to remind him on the time when we were dating, and he would say those 3 words and reaching my house 30 minutes or more. Sigh!! Why can’t he be on time or just being truthful? He was just taking his sweet time in the bathroom, dressed up and meddling in front of television before going out from the house.

So guys out there. Just say what you are doing and better still, specify how much time you needed to show your face!! Simple as that, we don’t demand you to be punctual (although I wish I could change Big J’s time management), just don’t lie to your women. You don’t want us to wait for you endlessly, right? And for those impatient girl friends, some day there will be no more waiting, believe me!!

Companion on the road

Everyday need to get out from the house around 7.30am. Need to send Little J to her baby sitter, and usually reached the house around 7.45am.

After that, drive all the way to work, and usually reach the office car park around 8.10am. Again, depends on the traffic and weather, the duration from baby sitter's house to office varies from 20 - 25 minutes. So, as you see, it will take me about 40 - 45 minutes on the road.

For the first 15 - 20 minutes, I would have Little J keep me company, always chatting at the back of the car. She no longer sit in her toddler seat as I took the cushion for a wash prior to Chinese New Year and too lazy to install it back to the car! I am training her to sit at the back of the car and slowly introduce car safety belt to her.

As always Little J cant never sit still in the seat for a minute. She will shout, chat and point here and there. When ever she sees anything familiar, such as the big metal hornbill bird statue at BDC flyover, she will say "big bird" or sometimes "hi big bird" to me! Now with the general election around the corner, everywhere are those political parties' banners and fish tails. So, I take this opportunity to teach Little J new word, i.e. "flag"!

This morning, she saw some banners while on the way to baby sitter, and start shouting "flag flag" to me! Inside, I am happy that she is fast learner and remember the word well!! But sometimes, wish that she would stay quiet and still in the car, not jumping up and down at the back! So that I could concentrate well on the road in front of me, instead of at the back!! Jen, I guess you know what I mean right? We been your back passengers before. LOL

Splashing Away

I brought Little J for an overnight stay at my parents’ house on Saturday night, since Big J is away for the weekend. Little J was not that eager to sleep over as I guess kids at this age are still much attached to their bed and bedroom. It took me almost an hour to pacify her to sleep! LOL!

Thank god I bought her “sleeping pill” along. This pill is not those small pill to assist you in sleeping, okay? And I know it is not good to give to young children some more! ;p What I meant by her sleeping pill is her favourite DVD. Yeah, Alvin and the chipmunks. I brought the DVD along, and it is good thing because she asked for it at night and the next morning! Not to say that I am bluffing, my family finally admitted that she is a one hell of a Chipmunk fan! Woke up at 6am in the morning, she asked her aunty to on the DVD for her! Btw we slept together with my sister. And my poor sister, I guess she hardly have any sleep that night! LOL!

Check out this photograph. No! We are not stealing those water, but the relevant authority came to switch on the water for some checking. This fire hydrant is just located in front of our house. So, we are just helping ourselves to those “free water”. My mum busy filling up the buckets with it, where as Little J didn’t want to stop playing with the water. As for my poor dad, he accompanied her for almost half an hour under the sun!

We have no choice but to trick Little J into the house! Guess what trick were we using? Some more splashing of course! Yes, dad has a bath tub at home so we just let Little J play some more!

Look at her! She was so happy and content playing in the bath tub, enjoying the cool water on a hot sunny day! Hope she doesnt catch any cold from over-playing! LOL!

Mr and Mrs Right?

No one is perfect. Everyone has their flaws, whether you like it or not. It is facts of life, you just have to accept it, not you liking it.

Big J is not the handsomest man in the pool but I never commented on his looks. I have friends came back to me either they themselves or they overheard from other on my taste (when Big J was my boyfriend) as they know that Big J doesn’t fit in the qualities that I look in men. Hahaha! Talking about setting a mark! Big J is a smoker, drinker and Foochow! The qualities that I look (or looked as it was in the past) are non-smoker, non-drinker and definitely not a Foochow! I am not discriminating, but I never thought of having a Foochow man as a boyfriend before! *wink*

My friends were worry that I was blind and simply “choose” without much thinking. At least I know that my friends were concern and always have my interest at heart! But I proved them wrong that I am not so into looks but more on character. Big J was (and still is although he seldom show it now) romantic, intelligent and hardworking man. I feel comfortable with him. I don’t care what other think of him!

So here I go, married to Big J after 3 years dating. Never regret my decision as I know he is my Mr Right in the sense he loves me and will stand by me through the hard and good times. He stop going out at night and seldom drink since Little J came into the picture. Thank god for that. Although cant change his smoking habit much, he definitely try his best not to smoke in front of Little J which I am grateful for.

So, how to determine whether that person is your Mr or Mrs Right? There is no perfect guideline for this, but it is based on your instinct! You will know that he is the one for you! You feel comfortable when around him, no pretence when he is there and you can be yourself. If he is your Mr Right, grab him before other does!! Looks can be deceiving. What good does it bring if that person is the most handsome man in the world and yet he has the heart of a stone?? It is quality and character that you should be looking into that person.....look further and you shall seek.

Telepathy breakdown?

Have you ever encountered the time when u expect your other half to understand you better than normal time? Like expecting them to do this, but they didn’t do. Even after hinting to them, they still don’t take the cue. End up, you grumbling and angry with him without him even knowing why you are angry at?? Sound familiar?

I guess, as you have been living together for a while, you are taking your partner for granted. You expecting your other half to have telepathy skill and they will know what you want without you telling them directly in their face. LOL! I found out that this is not so true!

So, to avoid any communication breakdown, always follow the following tips:

Tip #1 : Never expect your partner to (fully) understand what you say. Out for 10 words, they are only able to receive 5 words out from your mouth. So keep remind them from time to time even when they said you are becoming like an old person nagging at a young child.

Tip #2 : No matter how long you have been with that person, everyday is a new day. So expect something new out from that person. He may suddenly not keen into music, but one day, he may knock at your door, saying he enroll in a music class!

Tip #3: Don’t trust your telepathy skill. Say what you want to say, don’t expect he or she to be able to know what you are thinking. Let him stop guessing. He cant read what on your mind, he is not GOD! So, if you want that diamond ring you have been longing for, say it out loud!

The greatest fan!

I found a loyal fan of Alvin & The Chipmunks at home! My Little J! She has grew fond of the singing chipmunks from Day 1 she watched the movie at home. Since then, she has been watching the DVD everyday when she has the chance to.

Every morning 1st thing in the morning, she would ask either me or Big J to switch on the computer and play the DVD for her! Then once reach home in the evening, she would want to go to the bedroom and request to play the movie for her again! Oh no! We grow bored of it already! Even Big J know how to play the music with his guitar!

On the other hand, we are grateful that she started to develop like of watching television (I hope I didnt spoil her and she attaching to television when she grows up). We know that once she starts watching the DVD, she would not move from her place and glue herself in front of the computer. So, I can relieve myself and do other chores and take my bath, knowing she is safely watching DVD in the room. :)

Birthday dinner @ Rock Road Restaurant

We bought a nice hamper from Ee Yan Sang for my parents’ birthday on Saturday evening. Want to guess how much it costs?

Big J also get a nice tea saucer set from Ee Yan Sang for me, a belated Valentine gift, he said! Huh? I didn’t ask for it, he just bought it. My guess is that he is expecting me to brew more tea for him in future and serving using this new set. Btw, he is a tea lover. I don’t think I will use them, shall them for our new house. *wink*

My parents invited us to their birthday dinner at Rock Road Restaurant on Sunday evening. (Yeah, I know, it should be our treat, but my parents always insisted us to save money and them should be treating their children instead to dinner! We also got a few scolding for buying them the hamper! LOL)

Rock Road Restaurant as the name indicated is situated at Rock Road, one of the busiest roads in Kuching. It has a reputation of been the expensive seafood restaurant around the city. However those that patronize the place would agree with me that their food is superb and ingredients used are fresh. Why not? Their seafood is taken out fresh from the water tanks!

As always, we had a wonderful dinner there. You order your food and get to pick up your own vegetables and seafood on the ground floor before proceed to first floor to their seating area. They have renovated their seating area so it looks more modern looking compared to their previous “traditional Chinese” theme. Our menu for the evening as follow:


Fried noodles
Tiger Prawn with satay sauce
Sze Chuan tofu
Steamed white pomfret (Teochew style)
Potato leaves with shrimp paste
Mixed vegetables in yam basket

How forgetful?

Big J is a big forgetful man I have ever known in my life. He can left his keys in some place and then forget where he put them. He lost his house keys outside before, not once, but few times that I lost count of them. He can even misplace his keys and mobile phone in the house! *Faint*

Even at home, after several reminder on a designated place to put his keys (may it be house keys, car keys, shop keys or drawer keys) he still take my nagging lightly and simply throw them either in living room or on dining table. My Little J used to love to play with keys, and always hide them away. So, one time, Big J took almost 1 hour to search for his car keys in the morning. So, been impatient and already late for work, he will call me up and scolded me for not helping him to keep the keys on his behalf! LOL!

Maybe Big J takes things for granted and lightly, and never bother about those small things. However been his wife, I am getting used to his style by now. I stop nagging him to put this item here and there, etc and instead start to re-arrange his items properly for him. I will place his car and house keys together with his wallet, mobile phone, pack of cigarette and lighter in his computer table's drawer in bedroom. So every morning, he would not rush like mad man hunting for his stuff!

Happy Birthday, mum and dad

My parents’ birthday falls on today and tomorrow. Their birthday is based on Chinese lunar calendar, mum is on 7th and dad on the 8th of first month. If follow the English Calendar, their birthdays would fall on 18 and 19 of February.

So I would like wish my parents “Happy Birthday, mum and dad”, may your wishes come true and stay happy and healthy forever. I love you both.

Abraham Lincoln:
And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.

Bed Time Stories

Little J’s night time stories before she gone to bed is not in form of story books but cartoon movie!! Her favourite movie is Alvin & The Chipmunks! After watching with her for first time during Chinese New Year, almost every night since then, she would ask her dad or mum to play the DVD for her! She will keep saying “toon toon” (cartoon) to us and we know that she wants to watch the cartoon movie again! I lost counts of how many time we played the movie. Big J was bored with the cartoon, that he skipped most of it, and only played the dancing and singing parts! Little J danced to the music, much to our amusement. LOL!

So, I bought her some musical cartoons today such as Pocahontas and The Lion King. Hopefully she would love them. Better play something new before both of her parents bored watching the cartoon with her! LOL

Never-ending Addiction

I have one big couch potato in my house! Big J! He can watch television and totally unaware of surrounding even there is fire or the whole house collapse in front of him! Once he started to watch television, his senses are like totally “shut down” and he would not function well. I have to call his name loud not twice but few times before his brain can decode and respond accordingly. Even he responds, it would be like 1 minute late!!Sigh!

Now he is no longer interested in television show, although once a while, he will lazy in front of it and been couch potato for few hours while having his dinner at home. He is into computer games since his monitor is back from “hospital” few months ago! Gosh! Believe me, he can stick to his computer for whole day, only breaks would be toilet breaks and meal breaks! I am now fighting for his attention with his computer game.

Every night after Little J went to bed or even before Little J dozed off, he will switch on his computer first time once he enters the bedroom! I always against him putting his computer in the bedroom in the first place due to space constraint and bright computer screen, but he never bother with it! How inconsiderate of him, right?? Anyway, once he plays his computer games, he will play till late at night or sometimes early in the morning. Usually I will nag him to go to sleep if I woke up in middle of the night and found him still glueing to his computer!!

Last time, we used to argue about his television habit, but now it would be his computer game addiction! Anyway, I am tired of been his “mother”, nagging him to take his bath, etc, so I just let him does his own way! It would be better having him around in the room playing computer games than spending times and money outside drinking and smoking away! Don’t you agree?

Memory of CNY

Little J and daddy, on the way to grandparents' house on 1st day

Daddy and Popo busy watching tv show

Little J busy munching titbits instead...

Wishing everyone Happy Chinese New Year! She knows how to say "Happy New Year"! Yahoo!

On the floor at a grandaunt's house

Trying to steal the musical book from her cousin

Introducing my new "assistant" in the office

How cute she is posing in front of the lions. Unfortunately it is rather dark on the background, hardly can see the lions.

Feeding some Koi fishes at a granduncle's house

Nothing much done....

I have a very relaxing Chinese New Year holiday. We didn’t do much visiting for the past few days except yesterday where we visited 3 houses in the afternoon. We lazy ourselves in my parents’ house for the 1st 3 days of CNY, and because of the rain, we just don’t feel like doing any visiting. Big J told me that he want to go back to Kapit next year for CNY, he was bored doing nothing here! Sigh!

Little J manage to watch lion dance on Saturday afternoon, her first time. She was pretty excited although was scared when they started playing those loud gong and drums. After that, she just getting thrilled, following the lion troupe around and even imitating the lion dance. She even show her lion dance to her grandparents and dad to their amusement! Sorry, forget to take photo of her imitating the lion dance! LOL!

Some of the coffee shops open yesterday, but it was like betting with yourself of getting both parking and seating as coffee shops were packed with patrons. Even if you manage to find a proper parking space for your vehicle, you may not be in luck of finding a table to sit on!! Need to queue up to find a table. Guess everyone bored of eating at home or out of food, so everyone hunting down those coffee shops that open around Kuching.

After a breakfast of kolo mee, we went to Everise Departmental Store for some shopping. Not a lot of people there! Usually the parking lot is packed with cars and its supermarket and departmental store are full with customers around, even where it opens at 10am!!

We went visiting to Big J’s aunty, then a cousin and finally another cousin of Big J. Little J didn’t take her afternoon nap yesterday so, she slept very early last night, around 830pm and almost dozed off with her milk bottle in her mouth! Poor gal!! Hahahah! Hardly cant wait to welcome her aunty and uncle back home from Kapit last night.

Last Dinner on Year of Pig

Sitting in front of my notebook writing this post, while waiting for my facial mask to dry up and wash it off my face! Just mesmerising the last day of Year of Pig and in anticipation of a New Year in more than an hour time. Hardly can sleep with all those noise outside, people starting to play fireworks. Little J exhausted from shopping (see previous post) and went for reunion dinner

at her grandparents' house!!

We reached there around 430pm. Once reached there, Little J very interested in her grandma's plants especially this lime plant that she kept plucking the fruits from the plant! LOL! Her grandma want to faint seeing her!!

Menu for our reunion dinner is very Hakka-style! All my favourite dishes! *smile* We had shark fin soup, Lo Ark (Hakka braised duck), Braised Pork Leg, Steamed Pomfret, stir fried celery with carrot and Fish Maw soup. There is Ngoh Hiang but mum reserved it for few day into CNY, in case out of food!! LOL.

Check out what Little J doing here? Try to steal one of the Lo Kum (Mandarin Orange). Later she is busy arranging and counting them, and not forgetting messing them around! Poor grandpa and grandma have to clear the mess but they have good laugh at the same time. LOL!

Little J with grandpa in the garden, busy grabbing the pebbles

After dinner, everyone has a relaxing chat outside the house. Everyone started to play fireworks that time (around 530pm). Hardly can see it, wonder why some people cant wait to play it after dawn where you can see the effect of the fireworks in the sky? Waste of money!! Anyway, we did play some fireworks and of course Little J was happy!!

As for the Year of Rat, my family has started to show interest in new hobby! Rearing guinea pigs! Or are they hamsters? I cant never tell the differences but I believe guinea pigs are bigger than hamsters right? 4 big guinea pigs in the family!

Decorations in the house and a picture of me and Little J

Ok, got to go, time to wash my mask off my face!! LOL! So, Rose and family would like to wish everyone HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR and HAVE A HAPPY AND PROSPEROUS YEAR OF RAT!

CNY Eve shopping

Not many coffee shops and restaurants open on last day of Year of Pig. We spent some time on the road hunting for some decent coffee shop that wouldnt charge double on this day to fill up our stomach. We manage to find one coffee shops that sell nice kolo mee that didnt charge extra, but guess what!! The food is smaller in portion! LOL!

Maybe it is men nature? They tend to like to make final shopping till last minute!! We spent almost 2 hours at The Parkson, The Spring in the morning shopping around for Big J’s new clothes and shoes. He spent few hundreds of ringgit just on his clothes and shoes!! Phew! Men clothes are pretty expensive. Nothing unusual design about men clothings yet they are much more costly than women clothings.

We went to Ta Khiong Supermarket too to do final shopping on food and other items, there along we spent almost RM200! We are broke! So, not much money left for ang pows giveaway! Hahaha!

As for Little J, she was pretty bored at first sitting in her stroller. Kept going in and out from the stroller and I have to chase her around The Parkson while Big J did his shopping! Thank god later I found out that Parkson staff did balloons give-away. That hold Little J’s attention well and from there onward, she quietly and enjoyed her stay in the stroller! *wink*

Little J’s likes and dislikes

5 things that Little J likes:

1. Playing with her dad’s computer and moving the mouse around
2. Go shopping and sit in the shopping cart
3. Munching on hard and crispy food such as crackers, nuts and biscuits
4. Messing and scattering her toys on the floor
5. A little hug and kiss from her daddy, mummy and other family members

5 things that Little J dislikes:
1. Brushing her teeth
2. Drinking and swallowing her medicine
3. When everything is against her will
4. When no one pay attention to her
5. Eating sour, mushy, and soft texture food

Baby sister

Who is going to win the tug game??

Big J’s cousin brought her baby girl over the weekend. Isnt she adorable? She is exactly one year younger than Little J! Born on the same day, just one year later!! From the look of both, they almost same size!! My Little J is skinny and tall, not much fat in her body! LOL.

Little J kept going to her baby cousin, Chloe tried to hug or touch her. She is pretty careful on not “harming” Chloe under her mummy’s observation. Maybe it is young children’s behaviour, they tend to touch other children and see whether they are a threat or friend??

The whole night, both children playing toys and messing around the house. Luckily Chloe just starting to stand, doesn’t walk yet, otherwise we will be chasing both children around the house. Little J doesn’t mind sharing her favourite toys with Chloe, which is good sign! She can share! However, occasionally both kids have a tug game when both doesn’t want to give in!! *Faint* It is very funny sight seeing both kids pulling and scratching each other.

When it comes to mummy, Little J stating her “property”. She blew her top and make a scene when I carrying little Chloe around. She is jealous seeing other baby in her mummy’s arms. She doenst mind having another children around, but not when mummy carry and hug them!!

Big J's new car

I have been driving darling hubby to his office for the whole week this week. Total time spend on the road is 1 hour from house to my office, in between sent Little J to her baby sitter’s house and Big J’s bank.

Big J has booked a new car and hopefully would be able to get it before Chinese New Year. It is rather inconvenient for Big J to work without a car as he is into sales. For the last few days he has been relying on his boss and other good friends to send him to meet customers and sorting out his car loss matters.

Oh yeah, Big J is getting a Toyota Hilux Commonrail. Another big car! Male ego I have to say. Big J just cant do with a smaller car. The new car is around RM95K. Downpayment of 10% has been settled earlier of the week. For the new car, he is going to install GPRS and advance alarm system. Already learn his lesson! Big car require extra precaution!! Thieves love big cars, so we are getting paranoid now. Better be safe than sorry!