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Thursday, June 30, 2011

Move in

You fall in love at first sight! You spending most of the time together and within a month (or week!), you move into his house. Is it the right move or time to live together? What would be the proper duration to move in?

Some couples move faster in relationship than other. Some probably have to wait till marriage then they will move and live together. I am one of the latter group. It is not that I am against those couples that move in before marriage but I have seen and witness a family member's failed marriage.

Here is a true fact about moving in before marriage:

Couples who live together prior to marriage have higher rate of divorce than those move in after marriage

It turns out that the "moving in" time does not strenghten one relationship. Some reasons couples stay together may be of financial, convenience or friends influences. You think that it is "cool" to live with boyfriend, have some one to drive you to work or can save on some expenses. The risk of moving in together too soon is that one of you may succumb to the Temptation to Settle for Less because it’s much harder to break up if you are staying in together.

So when would be the right time to move in? One would be when your relationship has reach the peak of maturity. Meaning you are so committed to each other and marriage is in the mind. You have same agenda and goals. Your relationship is solid as rock.

So if you just met someone and thinking of moving in with him, please take a breather and do not let the heart rules your judgement. You may be excited about him at first, but down few months later, he may not be the one that you are looking for. Moving in is definitely not a right solution of conveniences. Better wait till you are sure of your feeling.

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